At the police station, my favorite detective, Denzel Norton, asked me, “Why’d ya do it, Mac? Priscilla said that Marcos was just going to show you his pocket copy of the New Testament that he’d been faithfully reading ever since his acquittal in your trial that you prosecuted.”

“No shit?” I asked.

“Yeah, man,” my friend Denzel continued. “Priscilla said that Marcos became a “born again” believer in Jesus Christ after he got his life back when you lost his trial. She said that he wanted to show you the verse that saved his soul, “Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ, and you shall be saved; you and all your household.”

“I know that verse,” I mumbled.

“So why’d you do it?” Detective Norton pressed.

“I thought he was going for his gun.” I said.

“Priscilla said that she’s going to sue you for everything you’ve got.” Denzel warned me.

“Well . . . I ain’t got much.” I answered.

“It doesn’t matter,” Denzel responded. “She’s gonna bleed you dry . . . bleed your wife Maria too.”

“I know that.” I said.

“You’re gonna need a good lawyer.” Denzel advised.

“Yes,” I agreed, “. . . and a good judge.”

[DISCLAIMER: THIS DIDN’T REALLY HAPPEN. AT LEAST NOT LIKE THIS IT DIDN’T.]